The Worst use of CGI.
Following my late-night rant about the Chrome Effect, I’m moving on. After pens and pencils came COMPUTAHS and in the late 90s/early 00s it became a popular way to add some class, style and the illusion of having some dollar to music videos. Below are some fine examples of how this shouldn’t have been used until the technology was fully developed. Billie Piper - Because We Want To. Not content with having one badly animated ‘dancer’ among the street of ordinary dancers, Billie brings in the See-through Surfer to join in on the festivities. The addition of these two is completely irrelevant and even as a young girl I knew that they weren’t ‘supposed’ to be there. Then for some reason there’s a rhino. Shanks and Bigfoot - Sweet Like Chocolate. I remember when this came out, the song was awful but the video even worse. Is that supposed to be chocolate?! I don’t even know. The girl was creepy. Busta Rhymes feat Janet Jackson - What’s It Gonna Be? Dubbed as one of the most expensive music videos ever, this video centered around the Alex Mack-type transformation of Busta Rhymes, with hideous consequences. They clearly spent a lot of money on effects, but it just didn’t quite work. Plus, imagine waking up to this… …if only it were a giant gummy worm… Backstreet Boys - Larger Than Life. This little creature turns up at the beginning of the video, I wasn’t sure who it was supposed to be… Oh yeah and this blurry scene is Nick dancing with a load of robots, it’s actually *getting there* in terms of technology, however, it just reminds us of this…. Will Smith - Men In Black. Generally if you ask people what they remember about the Men in Black film they will say this music video 80% of the time. The dancing alien that was TOTALLY REAL. Oh yeah. TLC - Unpretty. Completely unnecessary addition, I’d imagine the meeting went something like this… “You know what this video needs to make it better”? “What”? “CGI bugs” “CGI bugs? Why”? “…makes it look like we’ve got some dollar”. “………………………..ok”. All*Stars - Best Friend. Excuse the quality of this one, it must’ve been ripped from a video or something…anyway, perfectly fine video then for SOME UNKNOWN REASON they decide to fly through a tunnel with a load of flags. Rubbish because it makes no sense. Snoop Dogg - What’s My Name? Not essentially the typical use of CGI buuuuut, it’s still pretty pointless and just points out how much Snoop looks like a dog. Spice Girls - Viva Forever. This video actually has a good example of CGI in it, but then, it also has this one. Some odd duck/goose/spring hybrid that appears in the beginning. Maybe it was used as a distraction for those who, like me, can’t tell if the lead child is male or female. Eventually time passed, people forgot about CGI then… we’re in the future. People who are doing it right. Kanye West - Stronger. Missy Elliot - Get Your Freak On. TAKE THAT BUSTA. She knows how to do scary-worm-snake-head right. Black Eyed Peas - Rock The Body. Robots! Dancing in the street! What kind of futuristic madness is this…much better than Billie Piper’s feeble attempt. This is match-moved to perfection (oh-er technical term). Katy Perry - California Gurls. Just cos they’re cute.
